Cheers

*note* the picture attached is the sunset of the last evening I was in Cape Cod. I am using that as a reminder that in every end there is true beauty lieing beneath. 

So while I'm still not feeling too well ( I think my loss of sleep over the last two days is the reason why. Flying over night always puts me out awhile) I figured I might as well write the blog post as promised since I can't nap anymore for some reason unbeknownst to me. On that note, I had this post all written out and it was really great and all (I even used a doctor who quote!) (Which I was quite proud of) and then- my phone just had to die last night as I was getting ready to finish it. I dunno,  maybe it's like my speech at my brother's memorial service. It was the perfect speech, I had put it in my purse and then all of a sudden- *poof* bye bye perfect speech. I was then forced to rely on my heart instead of my rhetoric. It is a hard task for to me rely on my heart due to the walls I've put up due to the pain Sean caused our family and other various reasons. I had put them up to protect myself and here I was having to take them down, in front of around 400 ppl. Not too fun sounding eh? However, in the same way, God used that to show me that I can't always plan everything and sometimes walls aren't the best thing. I am reminded as I write this of the verse( I am paraphrasing) that says with all prayer and supplication, let your requests be made known to God, and the peace which surpasses all understanding, shall guard ur hearts and minds, through christ Jesus our lord. God doesn't require us to guard our hearts, cause even in the midst of horrible circumstances, we can still be at peace through Him. How cool is that?? I would say pretty darn cool! So with that in mind, while going back to school in the midst of everything, is the tearing of flesh for me. It is my duty as a christian to say "cheers" to a new year, to pray for peace and to trust in this time. Also while I do that, I also will ask for prayers in this journey cause it has been a very rough beginning and I hope that I will have the strength to see it through. Thanks for taking the time to read this! Hope y'all have a wonderful evenin' and a great week.