Life in the Light of Pain

Hello all! I haven't written much since my mom almost died in march and now here I am, back again, after my brother died about 2 weeks ago ( June 3rd, around 3pm I believe. ) I can remember exactly what I was doing and where I was and the time it was when we got the call he was in the ICU...even as I sit here writting this, the all the painful memories just flood my mind of that day, which started out as a wonderful day, quickly turned into one of the worst in my entire life. I miss him SO much...I love him so much. It still just doesnt feel real still. Anyways so I just got back yesterday morning from choir tour in Nashville, TN and Asheville, NC...in which I went to some awesome churchs, ministries, sang a lot, and even got to hike in the smokies! It was so much fun! A wonderful distraction from everything going on. Also, I got a quite horrible sunburn yesterday unfortunately due to me falling asleep outside while resting on the base of the water fall in the hot tub. It was quite relaxing except for getting a painful sunburn from it. So basically I'm doing O.K. in light of things...just getting back on my feet after his death and praying for the strength to go on. Yet still, I am somehow remembering to pray to remember to give God thanks and praise in the midst of this, and for that fact, I could not be more greatful.

This Precious Gift

Note: this is an old draft from about two weeks ago...however I felt the message still remained pertinent. Please enjoy

"Philosophy is perfectly right in saying that life must be understood backward. But then one forgets the other clause – that it must be lived forward."--Soren Kierkegaard

Life is something beautiful...as I sit here in the Conference Room in the ICU, I look at my wonderfully sweet, younger cousin, Madison. So healthy, so beautiful-a beautiful gift from the God of all. I realized one thing, an accident, anything could take her away in a heartbeat. This life is so fragile, but so precious. We all have trials, heartache, heartbreak, births, and deaths occur in our life. Appreciate all of it. Every fight, everything said and done out of anger, everything...love life, with the good and bad in it, cause that's what makes it unique. I pray that's something we will all learn how to do...after all Christ Jesus has given us this beautiful gift of grace that allows to live through Him, even in death. I know my brother Sean will live on through him no matter what happens...I pray he makes it.